A rant on 'Net etiquette

Well, it seems that I again have let the pride get the better of me. I was reading an excellent entry in a friend’s blog, when I came across some commentary that really did not set well with me (is it “sit well,” or “set well?” I never know). In fact it really got under my skin. I had commented early on and mostly agreed with what was being said, but the next few comments said things about the entry (and possibly my own) that were not very nice. “Moronic” was an adjective that he used referring to the entry and comments, and that irked me. Then he proceeded to say that “you must be one of those…” to have written them. Now, I hope that this guy is not up for a judicial position somewhere, because he certainly has not read much with an open mind to go off making judgments like that about one’s political bent. So accusatory. So harsh. So little information upon which to base such criticism. What would his mother think? Would he be so ill-mannered in person? Would he behave thusly in a classroom or council meeting? I should hope not. But then, I don’t know.

Unfortunately my response was not much better, except that I did not call him out, label him, nor reject his theories as “moronic” when I most certainly could have done all of those things. Instead I simply used some of his own phrases and showed that, given his exaggeration, of course things could be the way he sees them, if in fact one is truly blind to how things work. Or something like that. I was a little upset.

My friend, however, is much more skilled at handling objections such as those of this fellow. He proceeded in a subsequent comment to detail and delineate much of the facts as they are, instead of how they have been perceived by the other. And he did it with so much more grace than I could have. I think that if it had been my own blog that I would have simply deleted the comments altogether, unless they were written by someone who was a friend (or relative) of mine. Perhaps they know each other. I don’t know. It doesn’t matter so much really. Let’s just say that I am not cut out for the realm of political debate.

The real issue with which I have a problem is that unlike face to face confrontation, where there is often some since of civility, a modicum of diplomacy, or at least a hint of manners, when we are surfing the internet, many of us drive with the windows rolled up tightly on the cyber-freeway in buffer to buffer traffic, honking and cutting down whoever gets in our way or happens to have somehow disagreed with the directions that we think are correct in order to arrive at a place at which we really don’t want everyone to end up (the mixed-metaphorical pun of the day). In short we behave differently because we feel the firewall will protect us from shame.

The truth is that one need not look very hard to find blogs and chats that are full of people who vehemently disagree and write all sorts of reprehensible things in the name of winning the point (not considered to be the classiest debate tactic), where they would not speak the same way in a coffee-shop or fireside chat.

It’s just manners, people! It has nothing to do with politics, taxes, laws, religious faith, or whether one drinks coffee or tea or any other equally enchanting beverage. It is simply being civil. Can we not expect so little from a “civilized” people?